Promo of The Week

[Killswitch]

Something new we have decided to start. Thought it would be a good idea to have this to show people what a good promo does look like. Also thought that it would make people want to work hard and get a promo up here. Now the promo of the week will be posted here, and it will be posted after both of the results are up. I hope that this doesn't start a bitch fest as it would be kind of a bummer if it did. Anyways here is the INAUGURAL promo of the week:

Devin Goldens Promo for the Main Event of Crossfire:

www.wikipedia.com has a page devoted solely to “The Golden One” Devin Golden. It gives a basic background overview to begin; followed by an “early life” section; a “road to wrestling” section, a “beginning in FWA” section with Golden’s time as a rookie and his initially failed quest to become X-Division champion; a “departure and return to the FWA section” with his X-Division title victory, reign, and pursuit of the Tag titles; a “becoming golden” section describing his three tag title reigns, feud with Aut Pax Aut Bellum and World title victory against Stu St. Clair at Mile High; and finally a “heel turn and beyond” section.

It looks like a normal Wikipedia page about any person or thing. However, as anyone knows, Wikipedia can be edited and altered and changed at will.

There also exists the following page about the chemical element known as Gold.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gold

Gold is one of the most desired objects in the world..because of its monetary value.
On the date of May 5, 2011 the previously noted Wikipedia pages were altered. They were quickly changed back to their normal, regular look. However, Devin Golden’s Wikipedia page and the page about the chemical element looked to be hijacked for about five minutes. Around 3,500 people viewed these pages in this time period. Hundreds of those people saw at first and quickly the word spread before it was changed. The two sites had over a million views that day but only 3,500 people saw what happened….a few fans sent in photos and print screens of what the site showed to multiple news sources, including FWA.com. Some made note. Others did not. No one knows who hijacked the site. Devin Golden stated, “No comment” when asked by media about whether he was responsible.

The following was posted on the two sites. Both pages read the exact same thing:


The Rotten Gold


“When objects rot, it isn't immediately noticeable. It becomes noticeable over time, but a few days, weeks, months...not quite. After a year or two...things rot and it becomes viewed as rotten. It just takes some time to become noticeable. Takes a few years of aging.

But gold doesn't rot. It is scientifically impossible. It does not go bad with age.
Somewhere along the line, Devin Golden went "bad" with age. He started rotting...to where it is noticeable today.

But Golden is not like normal gold. He was known as "The Golden One" for a reason. One-time X-Division champion and longest reigning X-Division champion in FWA history...three-time World Tag Team Champion...three different partners...one-time World Heavyweight Champion. He came in with a goal...to be "golden." Pun intended. He came in to have the will of a lion...the heart of a CHAMPION. Champions in this business have one thing in common...they are honored with the privilege of wearing and carrying and donning GOLD.

He came in to be a true champion...to live up to the moniker...the nickname. He did just that.

But…He became a victim. A victim of himself.

He thought too much. Tried too hard. He tried to force things. He got to the top and thought he had to keep everyone on their toes to stay at the top. He joined Moira and Ashley and shocked the world. He lost the tag titles to Aut Pax Aut Bellum and thought everything would slip from my fingers if.....if.....

He burned the world heavyweight title in front of Stu and Nemesis' own eyes...He called myself "the devil.” He "turned my back on the fans" as Stu and others have said. He stated he wrestled for myself...and he does. Devin is GOLDEN and have the desire to be a champion for myself...But, he started to fall after losing my tag titles...then fell further after losing my world title. Then, he hit rock bottom after losing my rematch.

It's not actually rock bottom. Rock bottom is the level that AJ Hart hit. The level that Mark Reynolds hit. Golden is a warrior and will always go out there and wrestle...never batting an eye or raising a finger or saying a word. Put the entire roster in my way and he'll go out there and take my beating with every intention of winning.

He hasn’t hit rock bottom...but he has gone rotten. Not the same kid that flew from the top rope against Draven St. Germain with shards of glass glued to his fist and blood coming from the side of his face with the Philadelphia fans cheering estatically. He hasn’t been that kid for a very long time, as he’s said numerous times before, but now more than ever he is farther from that kid than ever before.

People change. For better or worse, people change. Maybe he changed for the better. Maybe he changed for the worse. Depends where and how you look at the situation. Is he a better or worse wrestler for it? Carmine, Stu, and Ryan Rondo will find out.
No doubt Golden doesn’t like the fact he is teaming with Thomas Princeton and Wolf. Doesn’t like either....Wolf I have never beaten one on one in the ring. Thomas Princeton...no longstanding history with him. He’s a punk. Both of Golden’s partners could say they are rotten...but they're not. Wolf has family grudges. Princeton is just a rich punk.

Ryan Rondo...Golden has severe unfinished business with you. The one who ended his X-Division title reign more than a year ago. The one he hand-picked to become the follower and disappointed. Wasn't it Back in Business when Rondo lost the belt to Alexx??? The one-year anniversary is approaching and Golden has unfinished business because of what Rondo did... Now Rondo is coming from the kid sandbox and into the big playground. The big old fifth graders are there and they don't like the little third graders sliding down their slide. Either you a right hand into someone right out of the gates and PROVE YOU BELONG or you get the hell out of our playground. This is the main event. The light shines. Everyone is watching.

Carmine Reaper, the cold war feud continues. Rarely faced one on one and those times Golden walked away victorious. Always been compared to one another. Carmine has an undying will to prove himself as a true competitor and main event star. Yet struggles to hold your North American title. It was Carmine and Princeton back and forth. Alexx became the third wheel but still a wheel. When he won the title, Carmine became the third wheel and slowly the wheel is falling off the axel. Carmine isn’t envied for the Katie drama and your quest to re-attain the North American belt and Katie...but also not pitied. Grab your nutsack and become a star.

Stu St. Clair deserves more respect and praise from anyone in the FWA. He's been World Heavyweight Champion more times than anyone else. He deserves to carry Crossfire since inception. He's a mainstay. He was a better man than me at Ace's High. Well done, Stu...but he will not stay at the top forever.

Wolf is challenging Stu for the World title. Thomas Princeton and Carmine have been feuding for the North American title since the dinosaurs. Ryan Rondo is an elementary school student on a one-day field trip to high school. And as for Golden…just biding his time.

‘Some unfinished business to attend to,’ a voice says. Golden knows this voice. He can hear this voice in his head. He knows what he is talking about...he is talking about where it all began. No one knows who said these words...but Golden knows these words. No one knows the name of the voice...but Golden know the voice...because Golden has been saying THESE WORDS in HIS VOICE since he walked out of that empty arena.”

Why I thought this was the promo of the week was because of the innovate idea of it. Not much speaking but it worked. Also it went a different route one of the most creative promos I have seen in awhile.

[The Golden One]

Awww thanks Killswitch!! You didn't have to *blushes*

[Engaged To Ouellet]

Good idea and this was a great promo too kick it off with.

[Killswitch]

Here is the second promo of the week:



Cameras are rolling as black clouds are in the dark sky. The sound of lighting crackling echoes as a down pour of rain pours from the sky. A sound of crow cawing is heard as the crowd that was perched in cedar tree flies. The despite the down pour of the rain the sound of the crowd flapping its wings are heard as it perches on the roof of a church. The roofing tiles are in fairly good shape outside of being wet. Water, pine needles, pinecones and dirt flow down the rain gutters from the down pour. A wind blows as the pine trees and the single cedar tree around wave from the wind blowing. The parking lot of the church is empty. There is nobody seeking shelter under the roof from the rain at door of the church. The lighting crackles as there is a flash in the sky. The camera crew sees if the church door is open. The door is open as the camera crew enters before they become as soaked at the men on Deadliest Catch. They enter through the coat room as they proceed to corridor. Several portraits hang on the wall with a several bible passages written on a bronze/copper plates bellow the portraits. They enter the naive as there are white pillars to the end of the room where the podium is set up along with the organ. The wooden benches could be polished and redone as there are several of them on the outside of the pillars. The power cuts off just as the crackling sound of lighting striking is heard. The camera crew walks over to a door looking to find the breaker for the power. They open the door. Majority of the room has candles burning as they are spread about. Some of the candles have burned for a while as the wax from them has reached the hardwood floor. We a shadow on the wall. It is that of a man laying his back the wall. His head is tilted down. His long brown hair extends down to his shoulders. He is wearing a black leather jacket unbuttoned with no shirt underneath. He is wearing wet washed blue ripped jeans. Suddenly the figures begins to speak.


‘Burn into darkness
The last unholy reject
Burn as the world ends
Stand accused and count this
[*He pauses as the sound of lighting crackling is heard*]
Burn out the stigma
A murder done in portrait
Burn up the fortress
The last unholy reject
[* He pauses again as water going down the gutters is heard*]
Burn as the angels
Worm into the fixes
Burn with the facts of
Optic dimension
Burn with the hero
Splashing on the highway
Burn like a cable
Strung across it sideways ‘



• The man slowly lifts his head up. He has a thick beard. His one light blue eye and pure white eye stare into the camera. It is none other than Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair. He slowly resumes talking.


Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair: Salvation...I’m far from it. Pathetic for me of all people to be here. I want to be saved. All wrongs fixed. All sins forgiven and peace granted as my eternal flame burn brightly. [*Stu pauses then smirks*]Rapture is upon us. One day ending won’t change people but rather educate the world they are not comfortable with themselves. Everything needing to taken off their chest. Cleansing off one’s soul is not a suggestion but a necessary. I don’t deserve to be saved nor would I want to. I have caused more hurt and pain then anyone that can be named. No second chance given to me for what I have done. My history is legend. I am not reformed. Like counselling would do me more good. I would merely drive them into my painful life. It is no Disney filled life with the sound of children’s laughter. Moments for families that are picture perfect. It’s DEEP EMOTIONFUL PAIN steaming from when I was a mere child. That pain still exists and I have fed upon. I found no resolve nor did I address. I ignored it and dwelled upon to be ‘inspired’. From that I turned my own brother into a monster. He has no control for his dark passenger. No disregard for anyone but himself. I did worse..[*Stu pauses for a moment as he looks down at the floor as rain pouring down the gutters is heard. He slowly lifts his head up staring at the camera*] my own son is bound to be a monster. I can feel him within my soul calling out. I want to be there but I can’t. It would change him for the worse. He doesn’t want a father like me as I would be his black sheep he wouldn’t be proud upon. I would be looked down upon in his eyes. Ignored like I did without knowing for the longest time he existed.


• Stu puts his hand on his face for a moment then looks back at the camera as the sound of lighting crackling is heard.


Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair: I can dream being there for him. Me pretending to be someone else instead of being the sadistic, unforgiving killer. Being the father to Micah and not fear of him turning into a monster because of me. You can’t erase the dream. You can only wake me up from it. The nightmare is still there. I am guilty of creating two monsters. My blood runs through their veins. I couldn’t even keep my brother down with a DDT. It is like he has found his anti-venom to me. There was hesitation I excepted a reunion of sort but rather the snake got a taste of his own venom from his own flesh and blood. Hostility changes people and the bitterness overtakes. He has become sharper than ever. He thinking with his brain and his blackened heart. I blackened his heart but Sara, his wife keep it beating for love and loyalty. It has become clear from his actions Sara is far gone from saving him. Sara wanted her soul mate back and I wanted my brother back. Both were stricken by his venom. Disfiguring my face one week as stitches were required. Sara battered and broken emotionally forever. I don’t have many options. There must be another way. No miracle is coming my way to cleanse Wolf’s soul. Nor will there be any miracle for my son...Micah for him overcoming the dark passenger deep inside of him. The dark passenger will create an unfavourable monster that I could look in the mirror and mistake myself for. There is no hope yet a fire still blazes in me as not blood but venom courses through my body. I am damned as a whole for what I have become and who I have become. The sins of the father are laid upon his children. [*Stu bashes the floor with his right hand*] Damn it there is no stopping what I have done. It’s already in motion.


• Stu closes his eyes as the sound of lighting crackling as it hits the ground is heard. Stu slowly opens his eyes and focuses back on the camera. He has a bittersweet look upon his face.


Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair: I couldn’t go through with it. There has to be any other way instead of what my instincts are telling me. Can’t follow my heart as its nonexistent. I need to regroup and focus on something else. That something else stands before him. Proclaiming to be god himself and have a church dedicated to his followers. If you ask me that church is there just there for stroking an ego. Yes you already know who I am talking about as he talks in third person only to make himself feel that damn important. [* Stu look of bittersweet turns into a smirk*] Yes Self Proclaimed god Duke Drazin. Been so long since I laid my one good eye upon you. You still don’t look like a god to me more of a dog. You had all you can take but not all you want. I know you still want to be World Champion Drazin. Everyone wants to be World Champion. Hell for last couple of year you have ran your mouth of how I have run scared. I am too frightened to put an appearance bond down to ensure I will fight you. [*Stu chuckles then he grins*] I may be concerned with personal issues regarding my son and my brother but frightened is one thing I am not. Walk a mile in my boots in Drazin from my childhood and you can understand what fear really is. Constantly I was on your mind. I don’t recall one time couple years ago I was mentioned by you as poor old Stu. I am not that an old poor broken down shell of a man. Even though I am more of a monster than a man I will ever be. What do you have to prove Drazin? Your trash talking ability? [*Stu laughs*] It doesn’t do much for me. All it confirms is that you like hearing yourself talk just for the sake of hearing your voice. It’s like you’re trying to talk yourself into how you’re this god. You’re trying to get yourself pumped up by believing your own hype.


• Stu chuckles unpleasantly as the sound of water going down the rain gutters. He pauses as he continues talking. He starts clenching his fists.


Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair: To quote my mentor and trainer Jake Roberts DDT short trip bad landing. You’re setting yourself to fall. I am already aware you fell from the hands of Gabrielle. You got her gang of The Great Siege ready to ensure she walks out champion. You may feel cheated but who hasn’t? I was cheated out of a good childhood. My son Micah [*Stu pauses as the smirk disappears from his face*] was cheated of having a father. [*Stu lets out a sigh*] It’s a bitter pill we all have to swallow. You got your chance one more time at Gabrielle at Back in Business VI in Greensboro North Carolina at the famed Greensboro’s Coliseum. I don’t stand by your side nor do I stand in front of you. I am simply a ghost that finally met the one who was calling him all this time. I could look at this as a chance to make you eat your own words. The only gender bender I see is you when I make a man out of you. [*a sinister looks takes over his face*] You can only listen to so much disrespect for so long until action is taken. My choice of action could be verifying I am the monster. I still am in there; breathing and very much alive. Or fight you like a man. I don’t view you as a man I want to fight but rather SLAUGHTER. I need this more than anything Drazin. I have the fear of knowing I have created two monsters and one being my son. I need to release it all. I need to feel in control. I want to not feel anything but I can’t right now. I can’t shake it. Charon was right when he told me last week that a snake can shed his skin but never change. I need to find balance and I need to satisfy my dark passenger NOW BEFORE I BECOME TRULY UNSTABLE.


• Stu snickers as he looks down for a moment. He slowly looks back up at the camera


Stu ‘The Snake’ St.Clair: But I need this one moment to find balance. I am still very much a killer Drazin. Just need one quick moment to drop you with a DDT. I don’t care about Great Siege or Gabrielle for that matter. They can interfere or they can strike while you are down and out. They provoke me then I will care but I more concerned about the skeletons in my closets that I created. What course of actions I may regret doing. [*Stu sighs*] I am what is wrong but Drazin I will see you soon.

• Stu spreads his arms to side. The sound of water running down the rain gutter is heard followed the sound of lighting crackling as it strikes. Then suddenly a breeze blows inside the room as the candles are blown out. The sound of a crow cawing is heard as the cameras stop rolling.

That is how you do a scene people. And that is also how you rip into your opponent.

[Death Approaches]

Totally agreed with the pick, I got to say that it is one of my fav ever.

[Killswitch]

-FWA Back In Business-
-Greensboro North Carolina-

We interrupt your regularly scheduled programing to bring you this special announcement...

Your television screen goes fuzzy and then suddenly looses color. The letters K:tv appear on the bottom of the screen and you see The Astonishing Chris Kennedy sitting on a large black leather couch in his private estate. Kennedy is sipping on a glass of Pinot Noire while smoking a cigarette and smiling at the camera before taking his expensive Christian Dior sunglasses off of his face and tucking them into the front left coat pocket of his even more expensive jet black Armani suit.
Chris says nothing at first, instead taking a drag off of his cigarette and blowing the smoke directly into the camera before taking one more sip from his whine glass. He quietly savors the taste of the whine before picking the Websters Dictionary off of the black marble coffee table in front of him. He opens the dictionary and flips through the pages until he gets to the "O" sections, stopping on a particular page and skimming over it for a moment before finally speaking.

Chris Kennedy
Opportunity...Noun. A favorable or advantageous juncture of circumstances, a good chance for advancement or progress. A favorable or suitable occasion or time. Synonyms include occasion, opening, chance, break. How appropriate. Tonight at Back In Business I have quite the opportunity ahead of myself and all the tools required to achieve my dreams are accessible within myself. You all know who I am and you know perfectly well what I can do. I've seen my destiny play out each and every night in my own dreams and I promise every last one of you that I'm walking out of Back In Business a winner, Even if I am the first one in that chamber, I swear to god on my mothers grave that I will be the last one out as well. Nothing can stop the momentum that I have built, I'm going way too fast, way to strong. I have been undefeated since Aces High, beating Duke Drazin, Anthony, PAJ and the team of Devin Golden, Charon, Cameron Cross and Carmine Reaper. I permanently retired Bullseye Johnson and like Rocky Creed before him he is no longer able to walk let alone compete in active competition. The thing that my opponents at Back In Business need to understand is that this is my world, I just let them all live in it. I not only control my own destiny but I also control the fate of everyone I cross paths with, through my actions be them malicious or merciful. Charon is too busy worrying about my lover Gabrielle when he should be concerned with me, as it's me who will end up pinning him at Back In Business, Alexx is feeble minded and much too preoccupied with Katie and the North American championship to truly invest 100% of himself into the Elimination Chamber and therefore I will I eliminate him just as I did last month in the Carnal Contendership. James "Eyensane" Hughes is nothing more than a glorified curtain jerker and provides little to no threat provided his Over The Edge flunkies don't get involved. Then we have the Rebel Bad Ass, who as we all know brings about as much fight as a Glow Worm. Rebel will lose and then blog about how the FWA screwed him over and that it was everyones fault but his. Pathetic. And then of course we have Anthony, a man that I have already beaten with relative ease. I beat him at 100% and after his good friend PAJ breaks him in half over the TV title, he will be easy pickings going into The Elimination Chamber. It just goes to show who the shining star in this group is. It's not the spooky masked man, it's not the greased up pretty boy or the drunk redneck. It's not the cookie cutter paper champion and it's not the roided out Steve Urkel look-a-like. No, the only star in this match is the one you see on your television right now, The Astonishing Chris Kennedy. Enjoy the show, folks. I promise you it will be Astonishing!

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program




"This Is War" by 30 Seconds to Mars blares over the PA system as pyro rains over the capacity crowd, the thousands upon thousands of ravenous FWA fans are full of excitement and ready for biggest event in all of professional wrestling. The mood is electric in the Greensboro Coliseum and amidst the fireworks, bright lights and fanfare, the Back In Business logo illuminates from the ceiling, and we are reminded exactly how big of a night this is.
The FWA logo flashes on the bottom right hand on screen and the words "PPV Countdown: Back In Business Pre-Show" appear center screen as the camera overlooks the ring and fire works go off from each turnbuckle.
The camera zooms in on the FWA announce team as we see Langdon, Piers, Lucy, Baxter and the rest
of the gang, all decadently dressed and ever so dapper.

Piers: Allright allright allright!! We are just 30 minutes away from quite possibly the biggest Back In Business of all time!!

Langdon: And if you are watching this exclusive presentation it means you have already ordered Back In Business and are now joining as we countdown to the biggest event of the year. Can Wolf defeat his brother, the one and only Stu St. Clair? Can Duke Drazin finally capture the FWA championship after all these years or will Gabrielle prevail once more?

Piers: And who walks out with a Golden Opportunity shot? So much is on the line tonight and we haven't even seen our first dark match yet!

Lucy Pinder: And the Back In Business preshow is the only place your going to see this evenings dark matches without having an actual ticket to the event.

Langdon: I'm fairly certain that history will be made tonight!

Suddenly, all the lights in the arena go out and the Greensboro Coliseum quiets down for a moment as an ominous presence is felt through out the entire building. Several dark purple lights come on starting at the stage, going down the ramp leading to the ring. Smoke raises from the ramp and Charon himself comes out to a mixed reaction, the FWA still not sure what to make of this mysterious enigma.

Charon: Gaze into my expressionless shell of a face, try to decipher who I am, knowing that in doing so you begin to loose a part of yourself trying to discover a part of me. Your grasp on sanity slips and you feel as if relinquishing control, embracing lunacy and taking solace in it's freedom, is the next logical step in the never-ending story that is your perpetual downfall. Small simple mortal, trying to understand something you were never meant to. Who is Charon? That is the question escaping the breath of every creature in attendance. This mask is no mere disguise, it is my face, a representation of what I have become, how appropriate that it covers the man I once was.

Unfortunately, neither my mask nor my long winded, overly introspective monologues could protect my fragile face as The Astonishing Chris Kennedy delivered a life shattering Bittersweet Chin Symphony, nearly decapitating me and in turn causing me to feel more pain and anguish than I have ever experienced in my short, pathetic life. Knowing that Chris Kennedy bested me so easily, I now realize that for all my theatrics and parlor tricks, I am nothing more than a desperate nobody hiding behind a mask. A hopeless reject, trying to shield my previous failures from public memory by taking on an alternate identity, sweeping my filthy past under the rug. In an effort to at least save what little bit of dignity I may have had...

I am here to publicly withdraw from The Golden Opportunity Elimination Chamber and also reveal my true identity...

Piers: What!?!

Charon: You have heard correctly. I would like to withdraw from the elimination chamber. I know understand that I do not belong in the same ring as Chris Kennedy, and that masquerading around like some sort of phantom is not only painfully embarrassing, it's also quite unhealthy. From here on out, Charon is no more and you will once again address me as the man that I truly am...

Charon slowly removes his mask as the whole world watches in suspense, finally getting to find out who the masked man really is. It's so silent in the arena you could hear a pin drop. Charon turns his head down and slowly lifts his mask off before turning his head back up and smiling like a wild hyena.

Chris Kennedy: BOO!

The crowd boos, with some thinking that Charon really is Chris Kennedy, while the vast majority of crowd seems to realize that the deceptive Kennedy is trying to pull one over on them.

Piers: What?!? Charon is NOT Chris Kennedy!

Baxter: What makes you so sure, Piers?

Piers: Because last week Chris Kennedy and Gabrielle attacked Charon on Crossfire! THEN, Charon and Kennedy faced each other at the Supershow when Charon and the Crossfire guys took on The Great Siege! Chris Kennedy can not be Charon! It's impossible...

Langdon: I have a feeling Kennedy is taking us all for a ride.

Kennedy takes the rubber band out of his hair and shakes out that hideous looking pony tail Charon is accustomed to wearing. He drops the white mask on the floor and steps on it, shattering it into several pieces before looking back at his "adoring fans" and offering a maniacal smile.

Chris Kennedy
I got you, each and every one of you. How gullible can you people be? No, Chris Kennedy is not Charon and for that I am grateful, although associating that masked freaks name with mine does give him more of a rub than he deserves. Fact is that I came out here dressed like this clown, talking gibberish and acting like a weirdo to prove a very important point. It doesn't matter who is under Charon's mask, you people are all so caught up in the theatrics and parlor tricks that you fail to realize that the oh-so spooky mystery man is just some dude hiding his ugly mug under a mask. It doesn't matter who Charon is because it's Chris Kennedy that will be winning the Golden Opportunity elimination chamber, and that is not mere speculation, that's an honest to god fact and you all need to understand that. You NEED to.
You people just eat up whatevers served to you. Some looney puts on a mask and begins reciting gothic poetry looking and sounding like an Emo China-doll and you people take notice. I have beaten everyone on the Fight Night roster, from jobbers to world champions, and I barely make the FWA Insider Edition. Are you serious? You mean to tell me that it's doesn't matter how hard you work, the measure of your success is determined by how well you play dress-up? It's not Halloween and even if it was, I'm a grown man and have no time to waste on childish games such as "Guess who".
I don't care who you are Charon, you could be Matt Boudreau resurrected from the dead for all I care, I'll just send you strait back to the hell you came from if that's the case, and I wouldn't even break a sweat doing it either.

Charon prances around in the darkness orchestrating sneak attacks on women behind their backs. You can call me sneaky, slimy, deceptive, whatever you want but even I consider Charons behavior to be reprehensible and unacceptable. Charon's bizarre fixation on Gabrielle is not only disturbing, it's downright dangerous. Not dangerous for Gabby, Dangerous for Charon, because Charon attacked a woman I care about very deeply. The one thing you don't do f******k with Chris Kennedy's loved ones. The biggest mistake you could have possibly made was laying a finger on my sweet Gabrielle. I hope whatever sick and sadistic pleasure you got out of it was worth it Charon because I promise to make you pay. The Bittersweet Chin Symphony you endured on last weeks CrossFire was just a small taste of what I have in store for you, sunshine. When I beat you so badly that blood profusely escapes your broken and bruised body from every conceivable orifice, who is going to save you, Charon? Because it won't be your Gothic Princess, oh no, because I'll see to it that she suffers the same fate that you inflicted upon my dear sweet Gabrielle. An eye for an eye Charon, and what that means is the sadness you have positioned upon me when you hurt her will be avenged sevenfold when I step on Lauren Iris Servin's chest, grinding my boot into her ribcage and popping her left lung like a water balloon, this is of course after I have already defeated you in the elimination chamber

Chris Kennedy laughs to himself as the boo's coming from the crowd heat up, an unforgiving swarm of noise raining down on The Astonishing One. He runs his fingers through his hair to move the loose strands that hang over his eyes before continuing.

Chris Kennedy
No, I'm not afraid of the boogeyman and neither is Gabrielle or anyone else in The Great Siege for that matter because I already proved last week that Charon is beatable, Charon is weak, Charon is mortal and fragile. When the participants in this elimination chamber were announced, everyone said it would either be Kennedy or Charon who would end up winning. You have to understand how frustrated I was to hear my name associated with that carnival act. After Back In Business VI, after I do what I have said I was going to do, I will leave Charon in such a decrepit and debilitated state that he will never step foot in an FWA ring again, he will never attack Gabrielle again and he will no longer be fit for active competition. However, Charon is not my only "competition" in the elimination chamber. Ha, as if you could call them "competition". Last month when I entered as the first man in The Carnal Contendership, Alexx was the man who came out after me. Well, aside from outlasting and eliminating Alexx I went on to the final four. For those of you who may have missed Carnal Contendership, allow me to show you the highlights.

Chris Kennedy's theme song (The Deftones - My Own Summer) plays loudly throughout the entire arena and the camera pans in on the Titantron which begins to show a video package highlighting Kennedy's impressive run in The Carnal Contendership match at Aces High.

Ring announcer: Introducing the competitor who drew number one, Chris KENNEDY!!!
the crowd is electrified as Rebel and Anthony struggle back and forth! Both men fighting for position! Both men wanting it all so badly! Both men unwilling to ever, EVER SURRENDER as they battle back and forth! BUT CHRIS KENNEDY FROM BEHIND AND HE DUMPS THEM BOTH OVER THE TOP ROPE AND TO THE FLOOR! Chris Kennedy eliminates Rebel AND Anthony at once!

Piers: Both TV title contenders, are eliminated at the same time!
Langdon: This is chaos! Chris Kennedy is still in there! Amazing
Chris Kennedy and Charon seem to be working as a team as they gang up on Wolf! Charon dropkicks the knee of Wolf causing him to go on one knee. Kennedy comes in grabbing his head and delivering the ACK!

Piers: ACK! ACK! Chris Kennedy nails Wolf with the ACK!
Alexx makes a mistake of smirking down at Charon, giving Kennedy enough time to march up behind him and low Blow him forcing him to grab his family jewels . Kennedy just smirks and with simple push sends Alexx down.

Piers: Chris Kennedy eliminates Alexx!!

Langdon: I am sure he is proud of himself!

McDonald: Well, we are down to the final four. Chris Kennedy, Darnell Porter, Wolf, Anthony Jackson. One of these men will main event Back in Business!!!
we see Chris Kennedy standing in the middle of the ring, bowing before his "adoring fans" who are being quite vocal about their disapproval of Kennedy. Chants of 'You suck' and 'f******k you Kennedy" can be heard as The Astonishing One continues to smile.

Chris Kennedy
Now, I didn't win Carnal Contendership, but I just played that highlight reel to point out that everyone who is in this Golden Opportunity match, I have already beaten! I have beaten Anthony, Rebel, Charon, Alexx, everyone. Everyone except one man, a man who I have never faced. That man in no other than James "Eyensane" Hughes. Hughes is a poor mans Bullseye Johnson, and we all know what happened to Bullseye Johnson and we all know how it happened to Bullseye Johnson. James "Eyensane" Hughes may be delusional enough to think he belongs in this match but reality check: He isn't worth the $2.00 sunglasses he uses to hide his ugly face with. Eyensane thinks he is in Chris Kennedy's league but he isn't even fit to work the concession stands at an FWA event let alone stand toe to toe with the 2010 FWA newcomer of the year. Eyensane spent how long chasing after Joshua Diehl for the Young Lions champion? Did Eyensane ever once in his entire life beat Diehl for the Young Lions championship? The answer is an emphatic NO, all he managed to do was bore the living shit out of everybody, even Diehl who was so bored he vacated the Young Lions title and left the FWA altogether. I guess you can lump that up as a win for Eyensane, albeit not a respectable win but a win nonetheless.

So Eyensane failed to obtain the Young Lions title each and every time he stood in the ring with Diehl but one Diehl quit it should have been easy for Eyensane to become the Young Lions championship right? All he had to do was defeat a rookie, Juan Lopez who had been with the company less than 2 weeks. Piece of cake, right? Well when failure comes as naturally as it does to James "Eyensane" Hughes, winning any match at all is easier said than done, I'm afraid. No, you couldn't get the job done against Juan Lopez, not until you cheated to win. Who would have imagined a sledgehammer is all you needed to truly go "Over The Edge", so to speak. Even tonight, when you should be doing everything in your power to earn a shot at the FWA Championship, are preoccupied with retaining your Young Lions championship. How stupid are you? Juan Lopez is going to tear you apart, he is going to push you to your limits because Juan does NOT have a Golden Opportunity match to worry about, he has set his sights on the Young Lions title and that is all that matters to him, but you have everything to lose. Juan is going to beat you and take your title, then leave you too broken to even compete in Golden Opportunity elimination chamber. Will it have been worth it then, James? You already know the answer, but you are so determined to make it, so determined to be a star that you spread yourself incredibly thin, often losing as a result of having too much on your plate. Someone as simple as you should really learn to take it easy.

Eyensane, neither one of us have addressed the elephant in the room. You know what I am talking about. Your little virgin girlfriend Nolee LaCroix. Although, when I kissed her, the way she grabbed certain parts of me with her dainty little hands, you could hardly tell that she was a virgin. You have have any idea how bad she wanted it? While her cellphone was going off, she ignored each and every one of your phone calls as I ran my tongue up her neck and my hand up her thigh, and she was trying oh-so-hard not to give in. Before I sent her on her way she told me that she loved you and would never cheat on you, then I kissed her one more time to remind her what she was missing out on. I think maybe there are a few things young Nolee isn't telling you, Eyensane. Maybe a proper interrogation is order, her whole ''innocent virgin" act is quite convincing but you never can be too sure and you never want to turn a hoe into a housewife. Maybe it's because you let her run around with sluts like Dinorah Redgrave and Alana Allure, I don't know. But what I do know is that if you don't take your focus off of your little 'slut in training' and your Young Jobbers title, you will lose sight of what really matters, the FWA championship.

Let's just be honest, Eyensane. You wish you were Chris Kennedy. You look at the Great Siege and the things we have accomplished and you are jealous, to the point where you surround yourself with a piss poor siege rip-off, Over The Edge. As if anyone is afraid of a group that consists of a Steve Urkel look-a-like, A ninja midget, a roided out retard and a tattooed whore. Over The Edge is completely irrelevant. The official motto for Eyensanes band of flunkies is "If Your Not Over The Edge, Your Falling", what the hell does that even mean? On what planet does that even make sense? If you are over an an edge, you are by any and every definition falling. That's like saying "If your not in the car, you are driving" or "If you are not in the water, you are drowning", it MAKES NO SENSE!!!
A more appropriate catchphrase would be "If your not Over The Edge, you are WINNING"

Chris Kennedy laughs to himself and then paces back and forth for a moment before noticing a fat guy in the front row wearing a faded "Rebel Badass" T-shirt.

Chris Kennedy
Excuse me sir, are you seriously wearing a "Rebel Badass" T-shirt? Explain to me how anyone in their right mind would spend their good hard earned money on a Rebel Badass t-shirt. You may as well be wearing a shirt that says
"I'm a godamn idiot" with a big arrow pointing up at your fat greasy face. You should be ashamed of yourself. Don't tell me you came all the way out here to see The Rebel because if that's the case then you wasted your money, Rebel is the weak link in this match. He won't last very long and quite frankly it shouldn't be a surprise to anyone. I came to the FWA in September of 2010, almost 1 year ago, and since then I have not seen the Rebel Badass win one single match. Not a single one. How do you go almost a year strait without any wins and still manage to not be future endevored? Why am I even wasting my breath on someone as irrelevant as The Rebel Badass? Thomas Princeton said last week, and I quote "Rebel will be the punching bag of the Golden Opportunity match. I will be VERY surprised if he is not the first person pinned in that match" hahahaha...and this is coming from a man who has actually won a Golden Opportunity match. I have to say I agree with Princeton.

Rebel, I watched you revel in failure after failure. After Zaire Wyoming and I had defeated Confederate Funeral so badly that you two broke up, you went and pointed the finger at your partner Baphomet instead of at yourself where it belonged. What was your excuse then, when you couldn't actually beat Baphomet yourself when push came to shove? That's your problem, Rebel, you always have an excuse but never an answer. You will fail 99.9% and without fail you will try to pin your inadequacies on someone else. When you couldn't win tag team matches it was Baphomets fault, when you couldn't beat Anthony it was Anthony's fault, when you couldn't beat Thomas Princeton it was the FWA booking that was to blame, not the "unbeatable" Rebel Badass, oh no!
Grow up Rebel. Be a man, stop getting hammered before every match and filling your belly up with pickled sausage and boiled peanuts. Go to a gym for a change, get yourself back in the shape you were in when you first came to the FWA and take some time out of your busy day of fishing and beer drinking to actually prepare for a match, study your opponents, make your self better. You have no passion, no desire, no motivation and that's why you can't even defeat Anthony, a man I have beaten without a problem.
Rebel Badass you may possibly the biggest source of all your own hype, as you always promises a bolder, better Rebel. You spend so much time shooting on Youtube and updating your bitchblog instead of doing what you promised your fans, not that I am disappointed in any way because I will never be mistaken for a Rebel Badass fan. I just think it's adorable that you still show up without ammo to a gunfight each and every week and when it comes time for a PPV, your always the first one to pull out your pistol, as impotent and worthless as it may be.

Chris Kennedy walks out of the ring and inspects the crowd. He sees two busty, large breasted blonds, one holding a sign that reads "I Chris Kennedy" while the less intelligent of the two holds a sign that says "Alexx will u marry me???" Chris walks up to the two young ladies and kisses the Kennedy fan on her hand, causing her to blush and cover her mouth with her hand, her picture perfect complexion turning redder and redder by the second. Kennedy then turns his attention to the slightly less attractive and obviously ignorant Alexx fan.

Chris Kennedy
Hey Barbie, your friend here has astonishing taste, but what's your problem?


Big Breasted Alexx fan: Ummm, what?

Chris Kennedy
"Ummm" is not a word, you brain dead bimbo, now I asked you a question and your going to answer it! What's your problem? What does Alexx have that I don't have?


Big Breasted Alexx fan: Ummm, Ooooh! I got it! His abs! His abs are sexy...

Chris Kennedy
I have abs....


Big Breasted Alexx fan:Yeah but you're an asshole!

Furious, Chris Kennedy grabs the young lady by the wrist and pulls her closely to him, getting in her face.

Chris Kennedy
What the hell did you just call me!?!


Suddenly, an old man in a wheelchair next to the girls cries out

Old Man In Wheelchair: Stop! Don't hurt her, that's my daughter you got your hands on, Bub!!

Chris Kennedy
This is your daughter, Papa Smurf!?!


Old Man In Wheelchair: You bet your candy ass it is, Pretty Boy!!

Chris Kennedy
You mean to tell me that you are the one responsible for raising this piece of sh*t? This failure is on your hands and it's unacceptable.


*SLAP!!!* Chris Kennedy smacks the crippled old man in the mouth so hard his dentures flies out of his mouth, over the barricade and onto to the ground outside the ring. Chris Kennedy steps back and watches as the angry old cripples face go from red to purple as his daughters start to cry. Chris Kennedy mouths the words "Stand up and fight" before laughing hysterically and rolling back into the ring.

Chris Kennedy
Everyone give the piss poor father a STANDING ovation, lord only knows he can't give himself one. In all seriousness though, how can anyone openly admit to being an Alexx fan? Alexx is a tour de force in sexual ambiguity, he is a self expressed ladies man but I still can't determine whether he is Gay, Strait, or trans-gender. Hey, what ever floats you boat, it's not my place to judge. All I can do is simply assess Alexx as a competitor. The only time I have squared off against Alexx was in the Carnal Contendership match, where I entered first and he entered second. We both went pretty far and came face to face several times in that match, the little prick even broke my nose, but It didn't stop me and with my intense anger burning a hole from within my heart, I channeled that anger into pure unrelenting aggression which I unleashed on Alexx, with each fist I delivered to his pretty little face, I struck down upon him with a metaphorical sword of justice, my righteous indignation propelling closer to dominance. The look on that diva's face as I threw him over the top rope, killing his chances of main eventing Back In Business. I didn't eliminate Alexx from Carnal Contendership just to let him win at Back In Business, not that the little prick has much of a chance anyway.

Like everyone else in this match, Alexx is pulling double-duty, only his other match will be quite grueling. He will be in a triple-threat match with Carmine and Princeton. Do you honestly think that either of those men are going to leave Princeton in any condition to leave the ring still standing? There is no way Alexx will be 100% going into the Elimination Chamber, and for a match like that you need to be 110%, which I will be because I enter this match fresh faced and completely free of any pre-existing battle fatigue. Most of the other men in this match can not say the same, especially Alexx who has to go through Carmine, Princeton, Anthony, Rebel, Charon and ME, all in one night. To win the Golden Opportunity, It's going to take more than greasing up your abs and blowing kisses at underage sluts and overweight whores. Alexx, you might have had a shot at this if you hadn't recently become North American champion but thats the road you chose, my friend. You have made your bed and now you must lay in it.

I will say this about Alexx, he certainly does prove that the good looking ones are also the stupidest. He is trying to get inside the head of Cameron Cross, but why? Why create more problems that aren't necessary? For all of his talk of being a ladies man, Why does he have to kidnap women? He's an odd duck, that's for sure. Some North American champion he is also, he really represented at the Super Show, displaying an impressive performance against Anthony. And to think he was only 9th Circled 3 times. I am noticing a trend here, I have beaten Anthony and I am stuck in a match with Anthony and a lot of people that CAN'T beat Anthony, which by default makes me some sort of god amongst men here.

After mentioning Anthony, Kennedy pauses for a moment and the crowd starts chanting "Anthony! Anthony! Anthony!", Kennedy looks visibly frustrated and then just chuckles to himself for a moment

Chris Kennedy
You know I am sick to death of hearing about Anthony. Since my arrival to this federation he has been the one person who I have wanted to silence but never got a chance to until recently. I don't buy into his hype and neither should anyone else for that matter. Anthony is a parasite comfortably nestled in the lower intestines of the FWA.
I look at Anthony, and I see the biggest cockroach in a devision full of other cockroaches. The Artist Formerly known as The Devils Apprentice still doesn't address me with the respect I deserve, still under the impression that he is better than me by any means. You see, Anthony, you may have an easy day at work when you are putting away jobbers like Jibade Jones, The Rebel Badass, and PAJ, but what happened when you stepped into the ring with a real man such as The Astonishing Chris Kennedy? Exactly. Your title reign may look good on paper, until you consider the fact that you have never EVER in your entire career defeated anyone of relevance. It's easy never losing a title when your only competition is a devision full of jobbers, curtain jerkers and wannabes.


When I first came to the FWA I asked Matthew Robinson for a shot a the FWA TV title, to which Robinson politely declined. I promised him I would beat you if I just got a shot. Robinson looked at me and said "I know you would. You are too good for the midcard, Kennedy. I'm putting you right at the top!"
So I never got a chance to prove to the world what an astonishing TV champion I would have been, but no matter, I still needed to prove that if I couldn't BE the tv champion I could at least BEAT the tv champion and that's why I personally asked FWA management for a non-title match against you, Anthony. And you brought as much swagger as a cabbage patch kid. You will always bring up beating The Bad Ass but you never mention your humiliating loss to Chris Kennedy. I understand that, the fact you CAN NOT beat me takes away any credibility you may have in any match I am also involved in.

Just like last month when I eliminated Anthony at Aces High, Just like a few weeks ago when I beat Anthony on fight Night, I personally eliminate Anthony inside that ring and walk out of the Elimination Chamber with a Golden Opportunity, because I have already proven that I am the best man for the job. However, all the wins I have racked up, all the momentum I have built means absolutely nothing if I don't beat every single person in that Elimination Chamber. I'm not just going to win, I am going to make it my own personal mission to beat every other opponent. First I will make short work of Rebel, then the next to go down will be Alexx, then I am going to lock Anthony in The Kennedy curse and make him tap out, THEN I am going to nail that masked lunatic Charon with his second Bittersweet Chin Symphony, only this time I will succeed in separating his skull from his spinal column. Since last year the common belief was that Chris Kennedy is the future of the FWA. Well I said it then and I am saying it again....The FUTURE is upon us, and you are all witnessing the dawn of The Age Of Kennedy, the beginning of The Astonishing Era and the start of The Kennedy Administration. This is my night, all you sad nobodies should rejoice in the fact that you were even part of it.

Chris Kennedy drops his mic and shoots the crowd a peace sign and a condescending grin as his theme music plays over the PA system and he rolls backwards over the top rope and out of the ring, waving to the crowd that despises him as he heads up the ramp and into the back.

Might have been longer then I normally like, but still this is how you rip into opponents. I loved it and it shows that Kennedy can be the future of the FWA.

[DramaShark]

Killswitch thank you
What an honor to get the promo of the week at Back In Business. I'm proud.